Prologue
Trevor Scott sat in the too
small plastic and chrome chair
of San Francisco’s St.
Mary’s Hospital holding
his best friend’s hand.
Brian Campbell looked like a
losing boxer in the tenth round.
His complexion was chalky, his
lips bruised and swollen. A long,
purple gash sewn together with
thick, black thread ran in a
jagged line from his temple down
to his chin.
He was a fucking mess.
“I want you to take care
of Lil for me. I don’t
want her going to some goddamn
foster home.” Brian’s
voice was a strained whisper
as he fought for his life.
Trevor tried to ignore the standing
IV’s, heart monitor, and
other gadgets that were attached
to his childhood buddy like long
feelers of robotic insects. The
sterile smell of disinfectant
made his stomach churn as he
took in a shaky breath. “Hey,
man, you’re not checking
out just yet.” Trevor aimed
to keep his voice steady. “You
can’t leave, Bri, you’re
all Lil has left in this world.
Hell,” he laughed, “you’re
all I have left.”
The Campbells had always been
Trevor’s second family.
More of a family to him than
his own parents had ever been.
He’d known them since he
was a five-year-old when they
moved in across the street. He
had been there when they’d
brought Lillian home from the
hospital two days after she was
born; she was now a curly-headed,
freckle-faced, seventeen-year-old
tomboy. When his own folks died
six years ago, the Campbells
had taken him in, treating him
like one of theirs.
He had already lost his natural
parents, though there hadn’t
been any great love loss there,
only horrific memories, but now
he had lost his surrogate parents
as well. He’d be damned
if he was going to lose his best
friend.
“Come on, buddy.” Trevor
lightly shook Brian’s shoulder
when he drifted off, eyes closed,
breathing erratic. “Lil
needs you.”
Brian moaned in pain, letting
out a few guttural coughs. Trevor
nearly lost it. “Let me
call the nurse. She’ll
give you something for the pain.” He
stood, unfolding his six-foot-four
frame, years ago rail-thin, now
muscle-bound, ready to make a
run for the door. Brian’s
hold on his hand stopped him.
His brown eyes opened wide, though
incoherent.
“Trevor!” It was
a hoarse whisper. “Promise
me that you’ll take care
of Lil.”
“Yeah.” Trevor blinked
several times. Pinching the bridge
of his nose with his free hand,
he fought against the emptiness
gathering in his chest. “Of
course I will.” Brian’s
grip relaxed.
“Thanks, bud. Now I can
go in peace.” His eyelids
fluttered shut again. A soft
smile curved one side of his
swollen mouth.
“You aren’t going
anywhere.” Trevor didn’t
want him to give up hope.
“Hey, don’t be bummed-out,
man. I’m going to Heaven.” His
smile looked weak as he said, “Least
I hope so.” A laugh sputtered
from his chest.
Trevor stood there by the chrome-framed
hospital bed, looking down at
pristine white sheets and the
young man who was approximately
the same color. The very man
who had been his friend for the
better part of their twenty-four
years. He had never felt so helpless
in his entire life. What was
he supposed to do? Wait around
until the cruel and uncaring
hand of death claimed Brian Campbell
just as it had Dorothy and Chester
Campbell? Just as it had his
own folks?
Yes, dammit, that was all he
could do. That, and pray. Neither
activity brought him any comfort.
Trevor swore softly, clenching
his jaw against the storm of
pain he was experiencing once
again. A pain so intense he had
hoped to never again experience
such soul-ripping torment. Yet
here it was for the third time
in only the past twenty-four
hours.
When Brian had grown quiet,
too quiet, Trevor’s heart
jumped into his throat. Seeing
that the heart monitor was still
bleeping at regular intervals,
he let out a long, shaky sigh
and relaxed a little, but was
too tense to sit back down.
He was glad Lil wasn’t
here to see this. She had flipped
out last night after she heard
about the car wreck. He’d
nearly done the same.
Trevor’s gaze followed
Brian’s labored breaths,
the shallow rise and fall of
his chest. The lousy drunk
might add another notch to his
belt before the night’s
through. Brian looked bad.
Real bad.
He and Lil had been invited
to go along with them last night,
but he’d had to work and
Lil wanted to get some extra
sleep before pitching at the
baseball game that was to be
held at the high school she attended.
She didn’t go to the game.
He didn’t go to work. If
they had gone to the barbecue
last night, they would both more
than likely be dead.
The way he felt right now, he
wished he was.
Tonight Lil would go back home
with him. Perhaps she would be
staying at his place for the
next who-knows-how-long. She’d
be eighteen in just a couple
of months. Knowing her, she’d
double-up her hours at the department
store and find a place of her
own. Lil was that independent.
That damn stubborn.
“Trevor?” Brian
frowned as he tried to focus.
“I’m here.” Trevor
bent down, closer to Brian’s
pulverized face so that he could
be seen. “What do you need?
Just tell me. I’ll get
it for you.”
“Just one more thing.” He
gave a short laugh. “I
sure have a lot of requests for
a man whose dying, don’t
I?”
“Nah. What are friends
for?”
“When I go, I want you
to have a Corona for me.
I hear God doesn’t allow
liquor in Heaven.” He smiled
again, a boyish dimple appearing
in his left cheek. A reminder
of how young he was. Too damn
young to die.
Trevor gave an amused snort. “I’ll
tell you what, Bri,” he
tried to keep the tears from
showing in his voice, “I’ll
down an entire case.”
Brian lifted a weak hand in
the thumb-up position.
The next thing Trevor heard
was the blare of the heart monitor.
Felt Brian’s hand slip
lifeless from his own. He didn’t
have to look up at the howling
machine to know it was flat-lining.
Brian Campbell, captain of his
college football team, future
psychologist, heartbreaker to
at least five women a month,
his very best friend, was dead.
I am not going to start bawling,
Trevor counseled himself, resting
his forehead on the side rail
of the bed. He forced away any
and all ballistic thoughts, when
all he wanted to do right now
was go kill the scumbag bastard
that did this. But he couldn’t.
Violence never solved anything,
as he well knew. Absently he
ran a finger over the bump on
his nose, sliding the appendage
under his left eye to wipe away
a tear that had spilled.
Besides, he needed a clear head.
He had to tell Lil. From this
day forward he was now her family--and
she his. They were alone in the
world. All they had from this
moment on was each other.
Before Trevor had a chance to
ponder over any more grim thoughts,
the door burst open, a froth
of white and drab-green pouring
through the opening, spilling
over to the bed where Brian lay
so still.
Somebody pushed him out of the
way so they could attempt resuscitation.
Voices were loud as directions
were shouted. The whole scene
soon reached a crescendo of frustration.
Limbs quaking and brain numb,
Trevor turned around and left
the medical personnel to their
vain efforts of bringing back
the dead.
As he stumbled down the endless
corridor, he headed toward the
exit, knowing he would soon be
facing the toughest situation
he had ever encountered: Telling
Lil that her brother was dead
and that he would be watching
over her.
Too damn bad they’d never
gotten along.
Chapter One
Eleven years later
Lil sat cross-legged on the
floor while Trevor lay draped
over her sofa like tinsel on
a Christmas tree. Both held a
white quart-sized container of
their favorite Chinese food.
Lil had sweet and sour shrimp
with steamed rice, while Trevor
devoured his Kung Pao chicken--extra
spicy. This was their customary
Friday night dinner get-together
and in-depth conversation that
was guaranteed to get the old
brain cells puffing and panting.
Tonight’s topic: single
motherhood.
“I mean, I’m nearly
thirty-years-old,” Lil
said, pointing at him with a
white plastic fork. “I’ve
all but given up on finding a
husband. My biological clock
is in its final hours. I don’t
want to waste what fertile years
I have left waiting for Prince
Charming to come along and sweep
me off my feet.” She snorted,
placing the fork and empty cardboard
container on the coffee table
in front of her. “I could
be dead and buried before he
ever came along. In fact, I seriously
doubt that there is a
man for me out there in the world.”
“I know what you mean,” Trevor
said around his last bite of
chicken. “I think I’ll
stay solo too, but my decision
is by choice.”
“I could be a single parent.” Lil
leaned back against the couch,
drawing her knees up to her chest
and wrapped her arms around them. “A
lot of women have done it. Why
not me? I’ll just find
some guy I know reasonably well,
that way I won’t be taking
the risk of contracting some
god-awful disease, ask him to
go to bed with me, and when I
get pregnant, cut off the relationship.” She
shrugged, looking right at him. “All
I want is a baby.”
“I don’t know whether
or not to take you seriously.”
Lil frowned. “What do
you mean by that?”
A slow shrug lifted Trevor’s
shoulders. “I don’t
know. Women have a strange way
about them occasionally, especially
at certain times during the month.
They either get pissy, weepy,
or, in your case, melancholy.”
“You know, you can be
a real ass sometimes.” She
sniffed, absently twining a finger
through one of her curls.
“Okay, okay.” Trevor
held up a hand, munching on his
last sauce-covered peanut. “You’re
looking for a surrogate father
in order to create a baby. To
add the final building block
onto your well-structured life.”
Lil nodded.
Trevor lifted his brows. Okay,
he’d go along with her
on this. “You’d make
a great mother. You seem ready.
Fine, I’ll help you choose
a father.” Lil smiled then
stuck her tongue at him when
he said, “Even if I do
think this is a crazy-assed idea.
How about Joe Reinhold over in
automotive?” he asked,
setting his empty container next
to Lil’s on the table.
He shifted into a more horizontal
position, his head resting on
one arm of the couch, his shoeless
feet propped up on the other
end.
“Have you seen his hands?
All that grease?” Lil shuddered. “I
wouldn’t let him touch
me with a ten-foot wrench!”
Trevor let out an amused laugh.
Lil stood, lifting his sock-clad
feet so she could sit on the
sofa. When she was seated and
comfortable, Trevor rested his
legs on top of Lil’s thighs,
looking at her through lowered
lashes. “Comfy?” she
dryly asked. When he grinned,
she rolled her eyes at him, but
didn’t attempt to remove
the big hairy legs that were
sprawled all over her.
Trevor stuck a finger in his
mouth, deep in thought, then
pulled it out and snapped, “I
have an idea!”
Lil groaned. “Please,
not another one of your lousy
ideas.”
“Since when have I ever
had a single lousy idea?”
She lifted a brow at him. “Oh,
how about the time when you vowed
to make us both rich, insisting
that homemade silk was the perfect
market? So, without warning,
you brought over two thousand
silkworms in ten different aquariums,
looking at me with those sad,
brown puppy eyes of yours, begging
for my help. As if I knew what
to do with two thousand silkworms!
A number of weeks later we had
a whole herd of white moths,
three-hundred cocooned corpses,
and not even the tiniest scrap
of silk.”
Trevor grimaced. “That
was different.”
“Okay. How about the time
you rented a hotdog cart and
had one of your blonde bimbos
push it along the streets of
downtown as she wore a string
bikini?”
“Hey,” Trevor interrupted, “I
made five hundred bucks that
day selling those hotdogs.”
“True. You also lost every
penny when you had to pay the
fine you received for peddling
without a license, and whatever-her-name-was
was arrested for indecent exposure.” Lil
laughed. “I do have to
admit though that your gym project
has come along quite well. I’m
amazed at all of the arrogant
muscle-heads who’ve joined
in the past two years. Men!”
“Now do you want to hear
my idea or not?”
“Let’s hear it,
Einstein.”
Trevor feigned indignation. “How
about Frank over in Electronics?”
Lil wrinkled her pert, freckled
nose. “Strike up another
lousy idea for Trevor Scott.
He’s too wimpy.”
“Kevin Greene?” As
soon as he’d said the man’s
name, Trevor knew it was a bad
idea.
“Kevin Greene, huh?” Lil’s
lips curved in a seductive smile.
He didn’t miss that wicked
spark in her eyes either. “You
mean hunk-of-the-month, Playgirl-centerfold,
hurt-me-bad, Kevin Greene?”
Trevor frowned. “I don’t
like the way you just said that.”
“Now what are you talking
about?”
“In all the years I’ve
known you, not once have I seen
your libido kick in. It definitely won’t be
Kevin Greene.”
“Oh, stop acting like
a jealous brother.”
Trevor was wide-eyed as he pointed
to his chest. “Jealous?
Me?” He went silent before
saying, “Oh, hell, maybe
I am just a tad jealous, but
I have to watch out for you.
That man has an ego ten times
bigger than his two-hundred-plus
pound body and twice as many
women lining up to worship him.”
“So?”
“Not Kevin.” Trevor
was getting edgy.
“Why not?” Lil absently
trailed a short-trimmed nail
over the scar in his right knee.
The surgery had been ages ago,
yet he still walked with a limp
whenever he was overly tired
or the weather got too cold.
Living in foggy San Francisco
played havoc with him quite often. “It
would be a night I’m sure
I would never forget.” She
indulged in a moment of fantasy
centered on her and hunky Kevin,
sweaty and tangled amongst her
bed sheets. Focusing back on
Trevor, she pulled one of his
leg hairs, making him yelp. He
knew she did it on purpose, just
to bug him.
“Hey!” He reached
down to rub his leg. “Better
watch it, Pill.”
Lil ignored his warning and
went on, saying, “I wouldn’t
have to worry about getting emotionally
involved with him since he only
loves himself.” She grinned,
displaying the same set of dimples
Brian had possessed. “Besides,
I’ll be getting a beautiful
baby out of it.” She sighed.
“Not Kevin.” Trevor
swung his feet to the floor,
missing Lil’s nose by a
fraction of an inch, and sat
upright.
Lil frowned. “And why
not, may I ask?”
Leaning forward with his forearms
on his knees, fingers steepled
under his beard-shadowed chin,
Trevor thought hard and fast. “He’s
... uh... he’s gay.” He
snapped his fingers, jerking
his head in her direction. “That’s
it, he’s gay!”
Lil’s mouth dropped open. “Kevin
Greene? Gay? But he’s so
hunky!”
Trevor got up to get himself
another lite beer, mumbling, “Yeah,
well, people can shock you these
days.” He felt like scum
telling Lil that lie, but he
couldn’t bear the thought
of Kevin manhandling that little
body of hers as if she was nothing
more than a piece of meat. Another
one of his adoring groupies.
Lil needed to be treated gently,
worshipped tenderly, even if
it was for only one night.
He opened the fridge, extracting
a clear, long-necked bottle,
twisting off the cap and swallowing
long and deep as he studied the
woman in the living room who
was clearing the table of their
dinner debris.
She was wearing a blue, faded
football jersey. THE PILL and
the number sixteen were on the
front and back in big white numbers
and letters, though they were
now pale and cracked. He had
given her that jersey for her
sixteenth birthday, and was surprised
that she still wore it after
all these years. Each time he
saw it on her he figured it would
head for the garbage rather than
another washing. But she was
a sentimental one and continued
to hold onto it.
When Lil was younger she had
inherited the title of Lil
the Pill; a nickname given
to her by Trevor himself. He
was always complaining about
how she got in the way, was always
a pest following him and Brian
around when they were all kids.
A royal pain in the ass. A pill.
As the years passed, The Pill
name stuck, but Trevor no longer
found her to be a pest. On the
contrary, she was his very best
friend. His companion. His solace.
She was also a freckle-nosed,
curly-headed pip-squeak who got
on his nerves from time to time.
Brushing past him as he lounged
in the kitchen doorway, Lil dumped
the empty cartons into the orange
plastic garbage can that sat
next to the fridge; closing the
door he’d left open, retrieving
the cap off the floor that he
had tossed in the general area
of the trash, yet missed. “You
really are quite a slob.”
She went to stand next to Trevor,
absently taking the empty beer
bottle he handed her, discarding
it in the trash can. She walked
back over to him, chewing thoughtfully
on her lower lip. “That
only leaves old Mr. Dower over
in Linens. I’m not that desperate!”
A sigh seeped from her lungs
as she went back into the living
room, plopping down on the leaf-print
couch. “Everyone else is
married, spoken for, or otherwise
unsuitable. I really want a baby,
Trevor.” She cast him a
woeful glance. “Isn’t
there anybody who’d be
willing to sleep with me a couple
of times so I could get my baby?”
Pushing himself away from the
doorframe, Trevor went to sit
next to Lil, their bare thighs
touching. “How about me?” he
suggested, surprising them both.